7 adults reveal things that their parents did unknowingly that had a negative impact in their life

7 adults reveal things that their parents did unknowingly that had a negative impact in their life
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hildren tend to absorb their parents' concern often and become traumatized, anxious all the time, and experiencing the same types of fears without even realizing it. Unwillingly parents transfer a lot of trauma into their children without knowing how it might affect them later in life. Most likely, a parent who was nervous or emotionally distant was also traumatized as a child. Therefore, the purpose here is to not hold them accountable for your shortcomings but grow out of it leaving the emotional baggage behind. Here are 6 adults who shared how their parents actions inflicted negative impact on them:

Recounting that bad experience, Shuvangi says, “This one time my father forgot to pick me up from school and I kept waiting for him even as they closed the gates and they told me to call him from the principal’s office. Being the last kid to leave school in the evening was pretty traumatic as a child. I'm not gonna lie . Anyway, he had genuinely forgotten and asked me to walk back home. Safe to say he heard an earful when he came back from the office that evening from my mom. I had new found abandonment issues after that.”

“As a child I feel like my parents were really cautious and kept me within their comfort zones, which prevented me from trying out hobbies or sports. This is the reason why I haven't been very involved in sports or extracurricular activities. So whenever I see my friends and family enjoying or talking about activities it makes me feel a bit uneasy and regretful,” an Anonymous user told TOI.

Supriya says, “My parents never told me that I’m doing great, exceptional or I’m gifted in any sphere of life. I was actually rather intelligent, but my mother would often say things like, "When your brother was in school..." to any success I had. I didn't feel particularly exceptional despite never failing at study and working in a multinational company now. Unhealthy rivalry between siblings rooted from this. Developing a healthy sense of self-worth has never come easily to me.”

Overprotectiveness and independence have impacted me individually. Restrictions for school trips and going out with my friends have also impacted me emotionally. When parents exhibit excessive care, imposing restrictions on the ability to explore and make decisions as an adult, it becomes challenging to take risks or make choices without seeking external support. This hinders both personal and professional growth, says Sulochana.

Sharing her sore experience, Reema says, “My mom mistreated me emotionally. To mention a few examples: She made fun of my curly hair, saying it had the texture of horse hair. I would weigh 300 pounds by thirty, she said, and no one would ever love me. She made me feel as though she detested me by insulting me all the time. When she wanted to punish me, she would act as though she couldn't see or hear me. This makes me feel less till date and I have poor confidence in life.”

Kamal says, “I understand that parents shouldn't unload their financial stress onto their children, but I genuinely believe that engaging in open conversations about budgeting, personal finance and not being shy to ask for their own money would have been incredibly helpful in my upbringing.”

Aakanksha says, "Instilling into young mind that 'taking a break' is a sign of failure" is something that weighs me down till today. As a kid I was regularly told that people who take a drop year or who don't continue their studies have failed in life. As I grew up with this thought at the back of my head, the moment I sensed failure I used to panic like anything and overperforming to the point that I had emotional outburts to the little things became common. Although they just wanted me to have a successful life ahead, it led me to exhaust myself to this day as I have a job."

"I am a single child of a nuclear family with just 3 people at home (including me). As my parents were working I was raised in the daycare system where an aunty used to pick me from the bus stop, feed me, make me sleep and the regular shenanigans. Once my mom got back home, she would cook and chat for a while and then open her laptop again to start working. There was very little 'family time' overall and all I learnt was that work was above everything to prove yourself," she adds.